This is powerful because this is what real confidence looks like.
Not the fake kind where nothing ever touches you.
The real kind where something does touch an old wound, and you still do not hand it your power.
That random comment did not define you. It revealed how far you have come. Because years ago, it may have pulled you into shame, but now your spirit could look at it and laugh because you already know who you are.
That is healing.
That is mindfulness in motion.
To observe the thought without becoming the thought is such a sacred level of awareness. Because we all have those human moments where the mind tries to repeat old pain, old insecurity, old voices that were never ours to keep.
But the truth is still the truth.
Your body carried you on those walks. Your body showed up in nature. Your body allowed you to create, breathe, teach, and be seen. That is beautiful.
Confidence is not perfection.
Confidence is presence.
It is saying, “I may feel the fear, I may hear the thought, but I am still going to show up as me.”
This is incredibly needed today. The comment section is a great psychological trainer tool that helps take blank statements that are foreign and alchemize them into productive thought sequences that serve great purposes.
The courage to be online and be seen is usually much stronger than the ones posting comments. I’m impressed always at everyone’s ability to be themselves, it’s a pretty amazing accomplishment. Be proud of your progress, and live will reward you even further
The observation that having the negative self talk thoughts wasn’t changing any action is the whole thing, because most people believe they have to feel confident before they can show up, when really what you’ve described is the more honest version, you showed up anyway while the thoughts were still spinning, and that’s not the absence of the old wound, it’s the proof that the wound no longer gets to make the decisions.
I am happy you managed to build the armor against the hate. I really don't understand how people can be so rude. Surely people we care about such as our relatives or friends aren't all in shape or perfect. So if we can respect them, why not a stranger.
Btw I saw your profile and I believe you care about connection and community. So I wanted to ask if I could add your name to a public list of people who believe loneliness and individualism is a crisis, and that checking up on each other has been unfairly stigmatized. We want to show that many people actually care. Our goal is to reach 300+ names of Substackers, and then we'll take the next step together, by doing something meaningful that builds on this community. Can I add yours?
This is powerful because this is what real confidence looks like.
Not the fake kind where nothing ever touches you.
The real kind where something does touch an old wound, and you still do not hand it your power.
That random comment did not define you. It revealed how far you have come. Because years ago, it may have pulled you into shame, but now your spirit could look at it and laugh because you already know who you are.
That is healing.
That is mindfulness in motion.
To observe the thought without becoming the thought is such a sacred level of awareness. Because we all have those human moments where the mind tries to repeat old pain, old insecurity, old voices that were never ours to keep.
But the truth is still the truth.
Your body carried you on those walks. Your body showed up in nature. Your body allowed you to create, breathe, teach, and be seen. That is beautiful.
Confidence is not perfection.
Confidence is presence.
It is saying, “I may feel the fear, I may hear the thought, but I am still going to show up as me.”
And that is where freedom begins.
This is incredibly needed today. The comment section is a great psychological trainer tool that helps take blank statements that are foreign and alchemize them into productive thought sequences that serve great purposes.
The courage to be online and be seen is usually much stronger than the ones posting comments. I’m impressed always at everyone’s ability to be themselves, it’s a pretty amazing accomplishment. Be proud of your progress, and live will reward you even further
Really powerful Joy.
The "I love and trust myself. I ENJOY myself…" line but almost a mantra is so good and empowering to something we don't often consider.
Loved this.
Thanks Mark! 😊 glad this resonated! ✨✨
The observation that having the negative self talk thoughts wasn’t changing any action is the whole thing, because most people believe they have to feel confident before they can show up, when really what you’ve described is the more honest version, you showed up anyway while the thoughts were still spinning, and that’s not the absence of the old wound, it’s the proof that the wound no longer gets to make the decisions.
I am happy you managed to build the armor against the hate. I really don't understand how people can be so rude. Surely people we care about such as our relatives or friends aren't all in shape or perfect. So if we can respect them, why not a stranger.
Btw I saw your profile and I believe you care about connection and community. So I wanted to ask if I could add your name to a public list of people who believe loneliness and individualism is a crisis, and that checking up on each other has been unfairly stigmatized. We want to show that many people actually care. Our goal is to reach 300+ names of Substackers, and then we'll take the next step together, by doing something meaningful that builds on this community. Can I add yours?
This is really powerful! I'm happy for you.
Thank you friend! 🥰
Okay. I can try with the negative feelings and work with them.
They are old fears and pains gripping. That’s it.
I loved this. So real and so true. Thanks for sharing so honestly on this topic in such a grounded way 🩷
Thank you. I wrote it to old me, who would never describe herself as confident and had a skewed view of what it would feel like.
The best audience to write to 🥰
did you put up a poll asking for advice?
otherwise very few suggestions apply to what really matters.
what kind of a diet? (I bet he knows that too)
should you exercise? (how does a stranger know what your body can do?)
strangers trying to save you unsolicited reflect their own hubris!
It was very much a classic “and you’re one to talk” kinda thing 😬😂
But my reaction was all I needed to know! I saw how I knew instantly he was projecting. Nothing in me took it personally…that was the flex for me 💪
heck yeah! kudos